To Blurt or Not To Blurt?

A humorous look at the question, “Should I blog?”

As a pastor/church planter I was unsure whether I really had the time to blog.  I was skeptical as to whether or not it was important.  I decided to research the subject before I made my final choice.

The word “blog” is allegedly a shortened form of the longer word, “weblog”.   A blog is one’s personal logs which may take many forms, such as various articles, musings, diaries, diatribes, or just whatever-floats-your-boat.   However, having researched my subject widely I have decided that the whole “weblog” explanation is one giant hoax.  It’s a big fat lie.  I now believe that the word really comes from the following equation: 

blurt + log = blog (or, a blurt-log) And a blog is a very special kind of blurt, but wait; I’m getting ahead of myself.

For this article’s purposes, let’s just call a spade a spade.  It’s a blurt.  It may be a serious blurt.  It may be an educational blurt. It may even be a fun and enjoyable blurt.  Make no mistake – it’s still a mental, emotional, persuasional or critical blurt.

Being part of the cell phone generation and the Facebook/Twitter/Blogosphere community has helped me reach this enlightenment regarding our current obsession with such expressions.  I have broken it all down into three basic categories.

The Blurt

Everyone who has cyber-friends on facebook has experienced this.  You’re reading along and suddenly you read something that makes you say, “Oh my, where did that come from?”  Blurt.  It’s kind of like passing gas without saying, “Excuse me.”  For those who prefer cell phones to computers, the cellular equivalent is a needless phone call where you listen to the other party ramble for a while, but it’s a manageable time frame.

The Micro-Blurt

I first experienced this on Twitter.  It’s still blurting, just fewer words.  The cell phone equivalent to the micro-blurt is texting.

The Atomic Blurt

Ah, the mother of all blurts.  This is the blog.  This is taking all your blurts and micro-blurts and compiling them into a powerful nuclear blurt.  The cell equivalent is a phone call from someone with no life, or an emo, or a telemarketer.  The conversation seemingly lasts a  eternity and it may take hours or even days for you to recover from the shockwave.

Here’s another equation for you:

If Blurt = Facebook, then Micro-Blurt = Twitter, and Atomic Blurt = Blog

or,

If Blurt = phone call, then Micro-Blurt = Text, and Atomic Blurt = a long phone call you’ve been drawn into and you’re trapped and can’t escape and it’s getting really hard to breathe…

Conclusion

It must be obvious by now that the conclusion of my research was that I, too, began to feel the urge to blurt.  I mean, look–here I am dropping an atomic blurt on you.  If my friends and family and the culture I’m engaging wants to blurt and they respond well to it, then who am I to hold my blurts in and keep them to myself?

Invitation

Do you have any ideas for additional blurt equations?  Go ahead, blurt away in the “comments” section!